Apparently my stomach is writing today's blog.

Today is Donald Duck's birthday. Happy Birthday, Donald Duck! Here's to the coolest duck without pants ever. That's right, you heard me Daffy. You can barely aspire to be the cool that Donald Duck was.

Like the new layout? I think it was worth the time spent on it. Besides, I needed a project to take my mind off my slowly eroding nose. I'm thinking of going into the Concentra clinic today. To explain the weather gadget joke to those of us that were not there--one evening a couple of weeks ago, Jeni and I decided to go get Indian food. Just as we were preparing to leave, the sky started to squeeze out water droplets the size of shoes. For some reason, we decided to take my car, despite the fact that my balding tires do not react well to wet asphalt. Jeni drove, which is usually a good alternative to me driving. The rain kept coming down, the tires spun out once or twice, and as per usual when I become stressed-verging-on-panic, I began a series of Tourettes-like-screams.
"Lovin' this weather! When is the plague of FROGS gonna hit?"
"Could someone hand God a monkey wrench so He can fix that leak?"
"WHOSE IDEA WAS THIS ANYWAY?"
Jeni, who has never had a problem matching me in volume (the only one who regularly surpasses me is ex roomie Laura) chimed in a few good ones.
"Stop splashing the windshield! Visibility is already negative two feet!"
"How is fourteen miles per hour on the highway going too fast?"
Then, lest we forget Nature's true power, it began to hail. Just pea-sized hail, mind you, but hail. We're sitting huddled in the car, passing chaos and car wrecks everywhere, when finally my psyche could stand it no longer and snapped.
"ALL RIGHT, WHO ORDERED ICE WATER WITH DINNER?"
Whereupon Jeni nearly drove off the rain-slicked road from trying to breathe and laugh at the same time. In case you were wondering, breathing, laughing, and driving are three mutually exclusive activities.
Needless to say, we made it to Bombay just fine, and oh MAN was it ever worth it. The rice alone was worth eating all day long, except that eating rice all day would make you explode. I had a drink made from mango and yogurt that I'm pretty sure changed my life for the better. The veggie and cheese balls were so good my pancreas fell out. Don't even get me started on the naan bread. I'm pretty sure there's a measure of that stuff sealed up in the Ark of the Covenant. It was covered in a sacred cloth, and we weren't allowed to look at it before we ate it. There was Holy Sauce to dip it in, also. I can't remember what Jeni got. I couldn't be bothered. I was too busy having a Food Seizure over my own meal.
Speaking of meals, I just finished with a cup of potato leek soup and Ritz crackers. They are now having a magnificent dance fight in my tummy to determine dominence over the viral infection in my body. While they duke it out, I will sleep the sleep of the well-fed and over-medicated.
Actually, I'm under-medicated. I can't find my Nyquil. WHO MOVED MY NYQUIL??